Things I Like About Trump: Part 1 — His Views On Religion
Something I hate to admit — I do admire Donald Trump for a few things. Sure, he’s the worst thing to happen to the human race since cancer but since the loudmouth, degenerate, country club bitchbaby almost got his head blown off just weeks ago —I figure that if I don’t mind breaking a sweat while looking really hard, I can perhaps find the good in him…
Trump Taught Me That Evangelical Christians Are Just White Wallets Waiting To Be Grifted, And Taken Advantage Of
This year, we’re having ourselves an unholy grift — er, I mean a supersale blowout with the best prices you’ve ever seen here in uncut capitalist hellscape.
Trump found a way to openly exploit and harm evangelical Christians to his most cynical benefit: $60 Trumpy Bible which, according to The Guardian, “uses public domain text from the King James Version” that — I shit you not — also includes copies of… the Bill of Rights, and The Declaration of Independence (?!); it’s a supreme example of present day Christian nationalism, while also at its absolute finest and most lucrative.
Quite frankly, I don’t know what to make of such a large population of people who seem to “believe” that they need to refer to an old book that’s allegedly thousands of years old — just to know right from wrong. For so long, “believers” have had such little faith in their own consciences; why wouldn’t they be compelled to shell out $60 for a completely unnecessary Trump edition of the good book; to help pay the legal fees of a conman that loves the Bible SO MUCH, that he can’t even name his favorite passage when asked during interviews.
Meanwhile, many evangelical Christians have absolutely no problem lecturing you about — how you simply don’t give a fuck about their old, creaky, fantasy fanfiction novel. Their egos are so fragile, that just the idea that someone like me, being an atheist — can be twisted around into what they would interpret as an automatic threat.
You know an entire religion is absolutely fucked when a majority of its followers can’t even tell the difference between “Christianity” and “Christian nationalism,” or — at least they don’t seem to care to know what the difference is.
Essentially, Trump is pulling the same type of shit Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker were doing to their followers in the 1980s.
It seems that only Trump has the power to keep nearly every evangelical Christian in the country on a dog leash — without having any real comprehension of what even goes on in the Bible, regardless of what testament we’re talking about.
I mean, seriously; Trump is such an apocalyptic asshole, that not only does he want you to buy a copy of his stupid, criminal Bible for $60… but on top of that— He ALSO wants your precious vote, despite you giving it to him already twice before; and, so that it can be the last one you ever have, immediately after he decides… he’s going to enjoy being a dictator a little bit longer than just on “day one.”
Quite the stark contrast to what we would be raised to believe makes a good Christian.
I feel like if Christianity was really working out in this country, then maybe we wouldn’t have so many homeless people. From what I’ve noticed, modern day Christians that support Trump see homeless people as more of a nuisance than Jesus did, apparently. Just a thought.
…Whatever the “Christian” thing to do is, Trump does the opposite. And they don’t give a fuck. They’re just like, “he’s chosen by god.” And that’s that. No more questions.
But you know what? Fuck ‘em.
If they want to pay $60 for a shitty, pro-insurrectionist Bible, well, then let ‘em have it.
If some of the same evangelicals weren’t in my family, I could probably enjoy this aspect a little more but still — very impressive, on Trump’s part.
He will happily scam, and financially drain his evangelical fan base in order to help pay his court fees, and also line his pockets with whatever remains of their social security check which — hey? More power to him. This is a capitalist country, anyway.
And Trump, being the professional victim that he is, should be allowed to abuse his right to trick and scam as many consumers that are gullible enough to support him as he can get away with; whether they’re voters or not.
And if you’ve been paying attention to the way Trump tells his lackeys in the legislative branch exactly how to vote — then you already know that when he returns to power, he’s going to end social security by privatizing it; that’s definitely a government program this country doesn’t need anymore… not sure exactly how boomers are going to feel about that but hey — surely Fox News would’ve told them about it at some point.
Keep it up, Pastor Trump.
